There is something about an American flag draped over a coffin that gets me every time. Bagpipes too, although I think one bagpipe is almost more effective than a legion of them. John Hefner’s funeral at Greenlawn had both.
I’m fond of Greenlawn. I’d rather not live there yet, but I like visiting the cemetery overlooking the bluffs. There was a news release recently naming Greenlawn as "one of the four best cemeteries in America.”
That’s noteworthy because every town has one and then there are cemeteries in towns that used to be towns but have laid down themselves and aren’t getting back on their feet soon.
I have childhood memories of Greenlawn with my friend Al. Kids like cemeteries because they can be spooky and ignite overactive imaginations. Watch out after dark, especially behind you, because something is probably getting ready to chase you.
We liked reading the headstones. I could be making this up but I thought we saw a “Happy Hahn” and another one with “Silent Earl.”
John Hefner, the former traveler, community cheerleader and principal of Fruitvale Junior High School, would never have been described as “silent” but he was “happy.” Happy to believe in people, encourage their better sides and happy to shake their hands and look them in the eye when he greeted them.
In his closing remarks, Bart Hill, a friend and hunting buddy of John’s, said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It is thinking of yourself less.”
Friend Vince Roche said what he really misses this time of year is watching Cal State basketball in person.
“I like being about three rows up,” he said. “Then you can see how big and fast these guys are.”
Cal State basketball, because of the fans’ proximity to the floor, is some of the best entertainment in town. Vince, along with about everybody in the world, is making a list of things they miss and look forward to seeing and doing again. Second on his list was live music.
Me too, and I’m betting both will return this year.
Marsha Parr reminded me that people feel passionately about their bagels after reading a note in a recent column about my favorite local bagel, Parmesan-crusted and topped with slices of Coastal aged cheddar from England.
“Dear Herb,
“I beg to differ! While one might enjoy a Costco bagel with coastal English cheddar cheese, it would come nowhere near the best bagel experience I would ever have.
“First of all a Costco bagel is not really a bagel. A real bagel is smaller, chewier and not really available in Bakersfield. They are not supposed to be gigantic, airy and flavored with chocolate, blueberries or cinnamon/sugar. My favorites are onion, sesame and the (newcomer) everything bagel.
“A real bagel comes from places like Western Bagels in L.A. or wherever Jewish delis procure their bagels in this country. Your chances are better in larger metropolitan cities like L.A., Chicago, New York etc. Guy Fieri has found them in other Jewish delis in smaller towns too.
‘While I adore English cheddar, the sharper the better, it is not in the makings of a 'best bagel experience.'
“Bagels are meant to be fresh daily, or cut in half and toasted and covered with a schmear of cream cheese. Topping the schmear, one should find a slice of purple onion, another of tomato and a thin layer of lox. A thick layer is fine.
“Because of the cost, a thick layer was not available to my family as I grew up. My mother bought 1/4 lb. for a family of four! Capers are a trendy addition, but none of my distant Ashkenazic relatives would have ever added them or recognized them if they saw them.
“This is the ultimate bagel experience. I rest my case."
Well put. Case closed.
Note from Elden Miller, my "brother in unhandiness," about the column on “putting up” a tree swing recently.
“Wanted to let you know you made the right decision regarding the swing. Three things stood out: 1) When you mentioned you tied the only knot you knew how to tie, the one you learned at age 5. 2) When you had to double check to make sure the ladder wasn’t upside down. 3) When you decided to call someone. I looked at my wife and chuckled and said 'See dear, I’m not the only one!' We have made several improvements to our house since we moved in three years ago. 90% of them have been initiated by the statement 'Babe, we better call someone.'”
January 19, 2021 at 03:57AM
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HERB BENHAM: Go brightly, my friend - The Bakersfield Californian
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Herb
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